Well well. Looks like someone finally noticed! I just logged on to see this:

deathbloodfangs (2/24/2009 12:37:18 PM): Hey. So word on the black market is that I'm being shunned for words spoken as an idiot. Sorry you took offense to my gay comment but honestly, I think James is retarded and said what he did to get you. Didn't he say he was grossed out by guy on guy then turns around and says he's pan? Whats up with that? Maybe I'm missing something but I'm just looking out for u.

No honey, you are not, and have not been, looking out for me. You've been trying to run off everyone's boyfriends and been extremely prejudiced towards gay men/perceived gay(ish) men, both for as long as I've known you. It is never okay to threaten to physically injure someone for "acting gay."

James did this amazing thing called realizing he was wrong, which was followed by something called an apology, and- gasp- a change in behavior. You haven't seemed interested in any of these things. That, up there that you wrote? Not an actual apology. It's really just "sorry that I got caught being dickish."

If your idea of "looking out for me" is being bigoted and threatening my friends, then I think I can do without it, thank you.

...So yeah. I think I'm going to send this or something like it back, as soon as I can get yahoo messenger to work right. Feel free to suggest changes/additions. I'd keep typing, but I've gotten to the point where I'm so pissed off that my hands are shaking.

Velma: You're one sixteenth Wiccan! You're the only one who can read the spell!

...Yeah, that's not how that works.

What the shit, y'all? What the shit.

The gist of it: Bus driver helps two elderly passengers across the street. Bus driver pushes them out of the way of an on-coming pickup truck. Bus driver sustains multiple serious injuries. Bus driver receives ticket for jaywalking. Other helpful passenger recieves ticket for jaywalking. Little old ladies may also receive ticket for jaywalking.

*folds arms, gives Colorado a Look over her glasses*

Ugh. Just ugh.

So, Emily and I had planned to hang out today. You know, get together, watch a movie or something, and eat some cake in honor of Singles Awareness Day (she has a boyfriend, but he's working today). Great, right? Well, no, not quite. See, in my excitement, I managed to forget that Emily is notorious for not following through on plans. Basically, if you go out of your way to make arrangements, she won't show up. Which would be less offensive if she would actually tell you she couldn't make it. But no. I had to call her, only to hear "whoops my grandmother wants to do something, sorry." But hey, Emily's family is batshit insane, so you can't really argue with them. So, not the worst thing ever.

But. Then I realized something. A large percentage of my friends do this to me. I can think of a small handful who haven't, and they probably just haven't had a chance to do so yet. I think I must be the backup plan friend or something. I mean, I don't have a problem with people being busy and having other things to do. That's called life. But when it's a pretty constant pattern, and you won't even tell me you can't make it, I can't really help feeling like I'm the only one placing any value on the friendship.

And if anybody actually reads this and is wondering if I'm talking about you, well. Have you repeatedly made plans with me and cancelled without warning or telling me? If you've had to cancel, but you did tell me, I'm not talking about you (I know this is for at least one person on here). If you actually hang out with me when you say you're going to, I'm not talking about you. If maybe you've done this once or twice, I'm not talking about you, but for god/dess/es/whatever's sake tell me when you have to cancel. I don't even care what the reason is, I just need to know if something's come up. I might be kinda sad if you have to cancel, but it's much better than not telling me and thinking I won't notice or whatever. Then if you keep doing that, I'm gonna end up thinking you're ditching me. And hey, if you don't wanna hang out with me? Don't fucking make plans to hang out with me. Just say you can't. I may not catch on that you don't want to hang out with me, but at least you won't be forced to spend time with me, right?

If you are, or think you are, one of the people I'm talking about, and would like to know how to "fix it" or whatever? All you have to do is tell me something's come up. Don't wait for me to come find you, put on your grown-up underwear and let me know. And if you've been doing this to someone else? Same fucking thing. It really isn't that hard to do, and leaving people in the lurch like that is not only extremely rude, but it makes the person you're doing it to feel like you don't actually like them or want to spend time with them.

It's pretty sad that the only person who wants to hang out with me today is my mom. (I love my mom, but I'm just saying.) Well, she and I are gonna get some Chinese food and eat a VDay cake! And I'm gonna play video games.

Happy motherfucking Valentine's Day.

EDIT: Fffffff, bahahahahahahaha. Okay, so apparently all I needed to do was complain about it. Emily just called and said she's coming over in a bit. Working the card section of Walmart on Valentine's Day gave her a headache (gee, how shocking), which she used to get out of the plans with her grandmother. So once she's gotten it to calm down/let the pain meds kick in, she's gonna come over and play video games or whatever. It seems Emily only shows up when you don't expect her, lawls.

Ahahaha, I wouldn't have to for any of them! :P The fun of being pan. (Seriously though, is this question pretending bi/pan/etc people don't exist, or what...?)

Ugh, 2009. 2009 is already fired. Well, originally, I was just gonna link to James's(eseses) entry about it, but then I typed all this word vomit. So enjoy. And I don't care that it's a block paragraph. Maybe I'll fix it later and maybe I'll win a million dollars and a pony.

Yuck. I'm all sick, but not really. I think it's a combination of slightly sick to begin with +not enough sleep +not enough food/water +too much standing around/browsing. It equaled me being all sick by the time Emmy and I actually got over to his apartment. So yeah. And then everybody else had something else to do, apparently (good job not being asshats, guys... oh wait. 8D I'm sick, I can say whatever I want. Lemme alone.). So the three of us Steak 'n' Shake, where... they decided not to serve us! I was really nauseous, and wanted some water, but nooooo. Eventually we left and went to Wendy's. (As we left, I saw a family sitting behind us that had only water. They looked like they wanted to leave too, poor things.) Wendy's was okay. So then we went to the theater, waited in line for waaaaay too fucking long (standing made me feel worse, as did smelling the popcorn, yay), and then goti nto the theater... only to find that the seats were so goddamned small that we couldn't sit in them. Seriously. Even wee Emmy was like "these seats are tiny D: " and I was all "I feel like spew and I don't wanna sit on the floor." So we left (for I am the fun-killer, huzzah). I didn't really care about being out the money I paid, but James tried to get a refund. Tried. I should've thrown up on the cashier/clerk-girl's shoes. What a bitch. So then we just went to Books-A-Million and Toys R Us. And stood around/browsed more, which made me feel worse. Ugh. Emmy kept trying to give us "alone time," but it's a store. So yeah. No. (btw, I still hate that Books-s-Million.) And then I just couldn't do it anymore, so we all went home. Blech.

I feel slightly better now-- a little less like death warmed over-- but I still just want to curl up and die somewhere. Ugh. Managed to eat, though. Feel feverish, but am not. Oh, and I'm kind of shaky. And cold, except when I'm hot. Yay. ;_;

At least the CD was passable. That's good. (And I'm gonna get some of that damn cocoa one of these days, lawls.)

EDIT: Goddamn, I just wanna whine about being sick, Mom. I don't think there's actually anything to be done about it. And the next family member that calls me "love" is getting punched in the mouth, set on fire, dropkicked into a pile of angry untrained pitbulls, and then thrown in a dumpster. It's not cute, or sweet, or familial, or whatever you think it is. It's goddamned motherfucking creepy, and it makes me uncomfortable. And we're not even British. I would understand if we were British. But we are not. So stop. I am not your "love." I am your relative. Stop it. >:( (PS- how the hell do I tell them not to call me that anymore? Not that I think they would, but you never know, I guess. Goddamn.)

...Hahaha, I run on rage and the despair of small children. I perked up quite a bit while bitching just now. Raaaaaaaaah.

I hate when I know my friends are upset, but I have no idea what to do or say. I'm sorry C&C, I kind of fail. (But hey, at least this semester's almost over, right? :\ )

In other news, I have one final (sociology) tomorrow, one on Tuesday (French), and then I go home! Fuck yeah!

An 8-10 page paper. A 3-4 page paper. A 1-2 page paper. A 5 minute presentation. A chapter test. All of these are this week. Oh good goddamn.


But at least I have chickena Scarecrow icon.

Goddammit, I hate crying. Why do I keep letting them do this to me? I try so hard not to care about what they think, but I still live with them, so it's hard, you know?

Look, I know I'm gonna need a post-college plan. I'm not stupid. Even if you did have the funds, I don't wanna mooch off you, because I don't want to owe you anything. And you know what? I was trying to talk to you guys. I was going to come out to you, since the opportunity presented itself and all, but no, you had to make it about you. What, because I'm young I don't have any problems? Good goddamn.

I know I don't have room to fuck up, okay? I know. I've known it forever. Stop trying to make me feel worse, okay? I don't know, maybe think about what you're saying once in a goddamned while. I promise, it's not as hard as you think it is, grandmother. Really. Some fucking tact is not a bad thing.

I'm so sorry I tried to share with you guys. I'll do my best not to make that mistake again.

On a sword.

Hey, if any of you are on Depo or something similar, don't ever miss your appointment. I was about a month late this time due to scheduling mishaps/forgetting to reschedule on time. They make you take a pregnancy test** (because all women are stupid, lying sluts who can't be trusted to actually not be pregnant when they say they're not, or something), but they didn't give me any advance warning. So, I did not have to pee in the slightest. The nurse actually had to go get me some water. And, I don't know if it's just the recent lack of sleep or what, but it was really stressing me out (as in, I almost started crying a couple of times).

So yeah. Not improving my opinion of the medical profession any. (For the record, I have mad respect for nurses, but not very much for doctors. Doctors are bastards.)

*stalks off to drink coffee and hopefully get lunch soon*

**Yeah, first of all? Depo takes a while to leave your system, so I would be unlikely to be pregnant. Second of all, I'm a virgin. Seriously guys, no babies. Ever.

So, does anyone actually have non-shitty parents and/or a non-shitty significant other? I mean, I have one awesome parent and one usually pretty good parent. (And no S.O., obvs.) But lately everyone around me's parents are being shitty/especially shitty (depending on the baseline shittiness of the particular parents), and so are their boy/girl/whateverfriends. Someone restore my faith in humanity please. D:

In other news, does anyone else get annoyed when you're chatting with someone and all you get is a series of links to things? Like, little to no conversation, just "hey, look at this!" every five seconds. Might just be me, I dunno.


In other, more pleasant news, I wore a skirt today! :3 Perhaps I shall take a pic, 'cuz it's a pretty skirt.

EDIT: Also, I really wish people would stop interrupting 'Stina (or anyone, really, but it's happening to her a lot recently) when she's trying to talk to them. It pisses me off, and I'm not the one trying to talk here! Basic conversational courtesies, get you some. >:|

Ugh. Thank you Dante and English class, for reminding me (as if I needed it) why I'm not a Christian. >:| Also, Girl in Class, maybe you should not call the teacher a prostitute.

Yeah. This is gonna be fun.

Goddamn. Yes, it's a season. Who the hell writes these? >:|

:\ :/ :|

... D:

So, I've poked myspace a couple of times to see if it sucks less than I thought. You know, just in case.

Uh, no. It doesn't. It's still terrible.

People with auto-starting playlists need to be fish-slapped. That is all.

I wish I had some other kind of academic skill, because I don't seem to make a very good English major. But you know, it's the only thing I actually know how to do, so...


In other news, I have a problem with professors who flat-out lie to students. I see what you were doing there, Dr. R, but it's still lying, and it still makes you a shitty teacher. sry2say.

Also, I, like many people, immensely dislike pretentious English majors.

I think I actually threw up in my mouth a little for real.

Hey internets? Can we stop picking on furries now? They're really not doing anything to you, y'know. Yeah, there are some vocal crazies, but there's vocal crazies for everything. I really don't get it. Picking on people just because you "don't get it" or whatever is, well... argh. Just argh. */inarticulate grumblings*

Not directed at anyone/thing in particular, it's just something I've been pondering, and then it came up recently, so... yeah.

Christina just had to use her pepper spray.

( Cut to spare you all )

D: There was fruit in my grilled cheese sandwich. Why was there fruit in my grilled cheese sandwich? D:

RAAWRGDSFLDSAFASLMsa;ldaSMFDLASFMLAGRRRHWERHWRGS?!!!!!

(No, I'm not Bale!Batman, just annoyed)

I know I just posted like an hour ago, but I have more rambly thoughts. Sorry. :P

Dear Douchemobile,

You've been making me feel really uncomfortable lately. You're just... I don't know. You don't treat me very well. You've been kind of condescending to me, which I don't like. You... act like you're in a position where you care (to some extent, at least) about my feelings, but you've demonstrated pretty clearly that you don't. And I can say that, because when I've asked you to not to do something, or tried to explain my view on something to you, I just get brushed off like my opinion doesn't count for anything. And uh, I don't even need to explain why I don't like that, do I? I feel kind of... taken advantage of, I think, in certain respects. And I'm not exactly hurt, at this point, just because I have no reason to believe you could have done better, you know? It's just kind of disappointing, I guess. Not that it really matters that much at this point, right? :\

Frustrated and frankly, sick of this nonsense,

Sparky

Fucking fire alarm. (Though, lol, from in the bathroom, it sounds like a really loud electric toothbrush.)

On an unrelated note (to anything, really), it's really hard for me to take you seriously if you don't capitalize, punctuate, or even attempt to use correct spelling and grammar. I can live with the no caps thing if you punctuate correctly, but a combo? Nope. Not reading, not taking you seriously.

I mean, really now.